Month: May 2016

I can’t believe it’s the beginning of October already!  The past month has sped by.  Janie and I have fallen into a rhythm in our 3s class.  As I suspected, we do work well together.  Sometimes she totally cracks me up.  When things get really crazy with our little students, she starts making jokes “over their heads” that I get, but they don’t.  Just when I need a laugh most, she says a little zinger and keeps me going.  I’m starting to look forward to my classes with her and time out of the office.

I’ve learned a lot from Crystal, too.  Now I know where the “secret book” is kept that tells the curriculum and projects for each day.  In fact, apparently I’ve caught on so well to the “Pemberton way” that I’m going to be “allowed” to lead the class this month.  (Why do I feel like a victim of Tom Sawyer?)  Samples of the art projects are displayed handsomely on a Pottery Barn hutch in the hallway for the parents’ benefit, but they’re never shown to the children, because we don’t want to influence the students and stifle their creativity.

However, Beverly and Cate don’t actually value the children’s creativity, because most of the time, the artwork displayed around the school is the work of the teachers.  When you drive up to a Pemberton school, any Pemberton school, you see these adorable little construction paper figures hanging in every single window, and they change with the seasons.  I used to think that was cute until I found out the art enrichment teacher made them, not the children.

As we were getting ready for Grandparents’ Day in less than a week, we were holding back and displaying some of the children’s artwork on the walls in our classrooms.  During one of their late night “raids,” either Cate or Beverly dropped by after everyone was gone for the night and saw what we’d done.  We were told by the main office the next day to take it all down because it looked “messy and cluttered.”  So much for appreciating the children’s creativity….

I keep fantasizing about Beverly checking in on me to see how my training is going after a month of working for her.  I say fantasizing, because she would never care enough to check on me.  That has become obvious very quickly.  If she did, though, I could tell her I’ve learned a lot, not only from Janie and Crystal, but from Linda as well.

I’ve learned how to make do with broken equipment (the fax machine and copier never work for more than a few minutes at a time), outdated technology (the main office insists on having reports faxed to them multiple times a day rather than simply e-mailing the reports), and a lack of staff (heaven forbid we should keep a staff member one second past a child clocking out that would drop us below the state-required ratio of teachers to students).  We must send someone from the staff home immediately, even if they’ve been promised more work hours than they are receiving.  I’ve been shown how to change time sheets and cheat teachers out of their hard-earned paycheck, like not paying Janie for the hours she spent in preparation for the beginning of school.  I’ve learned how to do the job of four people simultaneously, to drive myself to the point of exhaustion and ill health, and to knock myself out for no recognition, appreciation, or compensation for my efforts.  I have acquired and exhibited these skills repeatedly over the last month.

There have been a couple more “Varner sightings” in the last few days, but Linda has managed to avoid him, luckily for her.

I had to stop by the St. Peters Pemberton on my way to work this morning.  They had some more labels that all the Pemberton schools use for the front of certain files, and we had run out.  I didn’t think it was a big deal that they give us some of theirs.  After all, the labels come from the same administrative office, and the administration was temporarily out but had ordered more.  I was wrong.  Apparently I should have arrived in an armored vehicle, because by the school director’s attitude, I was taking the equivalent of gold out of her vault.

I haven’t heard nice things about her anyway.  Her reputation among the Netherville set is anything but complimentary.  At the very least, she must be a pretty tough cookie.  I wouldn’t want to work with her, given the gossip I’ve heard.

On the other hand, the Pemberton administration does seem to pit one school against the other in a very negative, competitive way.  I could easily see the administration withholding a future shipment of file labels to St. Peters claiming that they had given the school enough, forgetting that they had instructed St. Peters to give Netherville a large portion of its inventory.  And, after all, we’re talking about sticky labels here…an extremely rare and costly commodity, right?  (Pardon the sarcasm, once more.)

We also heard from Michael’s mother again.  It had been a few days, and we were hoping she had calmed down about his tooth.  She seemed to want to make a mountain out of a molar over the incident.  When I inquired about Michael’s tooth a few days after we had been made aware of what had happened, I was told by his father that the dentist had decided just to file the tooth down a bit to smooth it and then leave it alone, especially since it was just a baby tooth, and Michael would lose it in a few years anyway.  There was no permanent damage.  That was a relief!

I thought the whole thing had blown over until his mother called again today.  She wanted a copy of the liability insurance coverage our school carried.  Evidently, now she wants to charge our school’s insurance for the cost of her dental bill.  You know, the dental bill she incurred when her son ACCIDENTALLY hit his tooth (unfortunately) on our playground equipment.  Linda went ballistic.  She gave me the name of the insurance company, but she told me to handle this mother and make it clear that no one in the history of the school had ever filed a claim against our liability insurance and certainly not for something as insignificant as a chipped baby tooth!

I returned the mother’s phone call, but I waited until everyone was out of the back office for a moment.  I didn’t think I could do this with a bunch of people, particularly Linda, staring at me.  I gave Michael’s mother the name of our insurance company, but I explained that I didn’t have any of the details of the coverage.  She would have to call the Pemberton administrative office if she wanted that.  I apologized for the inconvenience but informed her no one had ever made a claim against our liability policy, so the director and staff at the school level were unfamiliar with the particulars of the policy.

“There has never been a claim?”

“No.”

“Oh, I see.”

I hope you do.

“He’s coming!  Quick, he’s headed this way!” Marcie, one of the teachers from the toddler end of the building, called into the office in a loud whisper.

“Oh, God!” Linda cursed under her breath, and she handed off the head count clipboard to me.  “Here!  Take this, quick!”

With that she dashed out of the office and in the opposite direction from which Marcie had come.

I was dumbfounded, but Marjorie didn’t seem surprised.  “What is going on?  Who is coming?”

“Shhh.  Can’t you smell him?  He’s almost here.  I’ll tell you in a minute.”

At that moment, I did detect the aroma of some very strong male cologne.

“Hellooooo, ladies!” he bellowed out as he rounded the corner of the office door.  I was speechless, and Marjorie hardly gave him a glance as she coolly replied, “Hello, Mr. Varner” and kept on working.  He was not an unattractive man, blonde, tall, tanned, muscular, but he instantly gave the impression of a man who, as my grandfather would say, I’d like to buy for what he’s worth and sell for what he thinks he’s worth.

A quick scan of the office and its occupants (only Marjorie and me) and an immediate appraisal and dismissal of me led him to pursue his main purpose.

“Where’s Linda?” he asked.

“Gee, I don’t know,” Marjorie replied.  “You know how busy she is.  She may have left already to go pick up some things for the school at the store.”

His face dropped.  “Oh.”  He stood there a moment contemplating his next move.  “Any idea when she’ll be back?”

“No, she may be gone a while.”

“Oh,…well, tell her I’m looking for her, okay?”

“Okay.”

He turned and headed back out the way he had come.

“Who was THAT?” I pumped Marjorie for information.

“You know the Varner boy in Kindergarten.  Well, THAT was his dad.  He’s a big-shot contractor and land developer.  He’s done very well for himself, and as you can tell, he thinks very highly of himself.”

“Why did Linda take off like a shot, and where did she go?”

“I’m not exactly sure, but she’s found somewhere to hide.  In fact, I’d better go see if the coast is clear and let her know.  I’ll let her tell you the rest of the story.”  With that, she left the office in search of Varner’s whereabouts and then Linda’s.

When Marjorie and Linda returned, I pumped Linda.  “What was that all about?  Were you really hiding from him?”

“Yes, and I need your help.  If you ever see him coming, warn me.”

“Why?”

“Well, last evening after you left, he came in to pick up his kids.  He pulled me aside and said he needed to talk to me privately about something, and before I knew it, he had pulled me into the adult restroom at that end of the building and shut and locked the door behind him.”

“WHAT?!  What did you do?”

“I didn’t know what to do, I was so shocked.  He started telling me that he’d been waiting for a chance to tell me how sexy and special he thought I was and that he wanted to start seeing me.  He pressed me to meet him at the shopping center down the street after work.”

“What did you say?”

“I told him I would.”

“WHAT?!!”

“I just wanted out of the bathroom!  He started putting his hands on me, and I thought if I agreed, he’d let me go.”

“Okay, that makes sense, but you didn’t GO, did you?”

“Yes,” very quietly, eyes cast down to the floor.

“WHAT?!!!”

“Well, I didn’t want him to get mad and make trouble for me here at the school, but I stayed out in public and his kids were along and I told him we couldn’t do it, and, and nothing happened.”

Okay, she lost me.  She was either one of the biggest idiots I’d ever met, or she loved this, the flattery and attention and drama of it.  Either way, she had just completely lost my respect and my support.  She was married and had two girls of her own; he was married and had two kids in our school.

“So, now he’s continuing to pursue you, and you’ve just encouraged him by meeting him, but you’re hiding in the building anytime he comes around.”

“Yeah.  I guess so.”

Oh, brother!

Small children learn quickly from the adults they observe around them.  In case you don’t believe me, here is a conversation I overheard in my classroom today.

“I will invite you to my birthday party,” said one girl (no matter that the girl’s birthday was months away).

“Why?” asked the other girl.

“Because you’re a girl and you’re in my class,” the first replied.

“Oh, okay,” replied the second.

“But wait, do you like men?” queried the first.

“No,” said the second without much emotion.

“Good.  Me, neither,” confirmed the first.